Lives in Manchester

Oh dear, here's where I need to "sell myself" (that isn't an option by the way) :P
I work shifts for the cops which puts a lot of non window-licking types off it would seem. People often roll me out at Christenings/weddings/funerals to regale some of the more amusing incidents I've dealt with...not always popular at funerals.

I've got a degree in English, so can hold my own in a 'serious' conversation, but am more puerile at heart. Time and a place for everything etc. I have a very dry sense of homour which isn't to everyones' taste, and bounce off like-minded people. Of course I don't actually bounce off people. That would be both dangerous and time-consuming.

I travelled extensively as a child (I'm talking Hong Kong rather than a campsite at Bognor), got married at 21, divorced at 31, have my own teeth and hair, and an apartment in Ashton-under-lyne.

I love living alone but have reached the stage where I feel I could be sectioned soon if I carry on telling my one-eyed cat all about my day?

Lastly, if your idea of a 'perfect date' is trying to convince me to let you stay at my place please keep looking. I'm very traditional when it comes to dating. 'Just looking for fun' applicants need not apply.

Kate